Tiger Woods in Nepal

Tiger Woods, in need of a well-earned rest, flew off to Nepal. But like any golfer on holiday, he had of course to try the local links - a mountainous course situated high in the Himalayas.

The club was delighted to welcome him but desolated that they couldn't provide a caddie as the Sherpas who usually attended were on an Everest expedition.

However, they assured him they could provide a yak who would serve very well instead.

"Sahib Woods," assured the secretary, "this animal is of inestimable value but you have to watch out for him as he does like to sit on golf balls. It is, however, no problem as you have merely to reach under him and remove the ball. The yak will then continue on with the caddying."

Forewarned and only slightly perturbed, Tiger set out. Over the first eight holes he had only had to remove the ball from beneath the sitting yak twice. Then on the ninth hole he had to drive the ball blind over a rocky outcrop. The yak took off after it and Tiger followed the yak. He caught up with it beyond the rocks. It was sitting in a water hazard - right up to its neck.

Tiger stripped off and dived in the icy water to rescue his ball. He groped around under the yak but could not feel it at all. He surfaced, took another deep breath and tried again. Still nothing. Almost frozen, he tried again but with the same result. Finally he gave up and frozen to the bone made his way back to the clubhouse.

"Hey fella, what's going on?" He explained to the secretary how he had dived three times for his ball but that the yak refused to move. He told the man how he couldn't find his ball and was almost frozen to death in the process.

"And" he went on " that bloody yak is still sitting out there in the water hazard"

"Oh a thousand apologies". The secretary was very apologetic, "I forgot to tell you. The yak also likes to sit on fish."