Bar puns
A bear walked into a bar and says, "I"ll have a beer...and some of those peanuts." The bartender says, "Why the big pause?"
A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "So, why the long face?"
A termite walks into a bar and says, "Is the bar tender here?"
A man walks into a bar with a slab of asphalt under his arm and says: "A beer please, and one for the road."
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