Chem one-liners 02

Q: How many physical chemists does it take to change a light bulb?
A: Only one, but he'll change it three times, plot a straight line through the data, and then extrapolate to zero concentration.

"A super-saturated solution is one that holds more than it can hold."

Isaac Asimov said that if you want to find a chemist, ask him/her to discuss the following words: 1) mole 2) unionized. As he so eloquently put it, "If he starts talking about furry animals and organized labor, keep walking."

Make it myself? But I'm a physical organic chemist!

Definition: (Fe)male: Male with iron added, for greater strength, ductility, and magnetisim.

Acid is base.

Q: Why do chemists like nitrates so much?
A: They're cheaper than day rates.

"Scale keeps forming inside the kettle", complained Tom, recalcitrantly.