Kansas is flat

When your dog runs away from home, you can watch him for three days.

The church choirs sing off key.

It is against state law to sell carbonated beverages.

You can steal a chicken on Thursday and get shot on Saturday.

If you stare long enough at the horizon, you can see the back of your head.

It is the nation's largest consumer of padded bras.

Natives get nosebleeds going over overpasses.

Prarie dog mounds are protected as state landmarks.

Topographical maps double as pool tables.

Water runs uphill.

The state animal is a roadkill.

Flat jokes are not appreciated.